Cizinci kam se podíváš

10. dubna 2007 v 19:02 |  Martii a její bujná fantazie=o)
Tak jsem se rozhodla jít s pravdou ven a poodhalit vám, o čemže to pořád přemýšlím a píšu a píšu přemýšlím (jak říkal můj status). Jestli se vám to nebude líbit, nebo snad s mým názorem nebudete souhlasit... máte smůlu, já už to odeslala, teď jen čekám, až mi napíšou, že jsem vyhrála. HA!!! Tak teda tady to je "Strangers around us", mé zamyšlení nad tím, kdo že to jsou ve skutečnosti cizinci. Samozřejmě v angličtině, česky to nemám a překládat a přepisovat se mi to nechce a taky... tak jako Zůzino ticho nebylo v angličtině to pravý, tak mýmu cizinci by prostě něco chybělo v češtině, takže přeju příjemný English time a úspěšný translation;) he
Strangers around us
At first I wanted to write a story about a man moving to distant place in a distant country. About man who feels foreign there. About the time which takes to became "one of them". But… Who are actually strangers? This word evokes many kinds of feelings. Are they just people living in another country, far away, someone you don't know at all? But what if you know an American woman much better than your neighbour? What if you have another "mom" in US, some good friend with crazy opinions living in Italy who you like so much! Is they frankly a stranger just because they live over the ocean? How many strangers do live in your surrounding and how many "abroad people" do you know well? And can't your ex-friends be something like strangers? Sometimes? And what about stranger in your own mind, another man in your body, somebody doing strange things in spite of your normal attitude? Everybody answers for his deeds, but sometimes it is hard to make sense of our own mind. Brain is so perfect and complicated part of our body that we cannot easily comprehend why it works the way it does.
I want to write about friendship changing into unconcern. Nothing pleasant. But at first, something for explanation my trains of thought…
Thinking about dullnesses doesn't bring anything good at all. In my opinion, everyone of us has sometimes these kind of time, when you just sit (or lie) and think and think. Theese times are not caused by good temper mostely, but by the bad one and after this muse is your mood even worse. Your mind is full of paranoid notions, gloom and desperation or other way round wrong hopes and suspense. And this exactly happened to me, and not just once.
It was round about two months ago, I had one of that really bad days, nothing went right and after my comming home, I didn't want to do anything! And then I started wonder about people. People I know well, people I know quite well, people I don't know although I probably should and last but not least about myself. As I said it really doesn't bring anything good, even during that time, trust me. I realized, that one, who I thought I should know, who understood me and who should know me, changed into someone so different! I suddenly couldn't understand him, I didn't know, what he is thinking about, what he is doing now, and what struck me really dumb, that I (unreasonably) didn't want to find out it!
People have been changing too quickly and you absolutely do not know why. It is quite slow plot in fact, you cannot remark it soon but after its finish it can seem really fast, because you didn't know about this turn at first, it is not discernible, it takes more than few days. One day you realize, that you cannot think aloud in presence of your "friend", you have to pay attention of every each word you're saying before him. He could turn it against you. Your conversation isn't as spontaneous as it used to be! And then you look into his face, just try to find something in his eyes, something that always were there. Maybe trust, understanding. Or at least some insinuation of any positive feelings…but there is nothing! These eyes aren't that one you've known for ages. He's looking at you through someone else's eyes! There is an alien standing in front of you. You realized that everything what used to be between you two is past forever! And you take notice of it as lately as it is over. He is not your friend any more. Of course you are sorry about it, but just for a "while", it's a pity that he suddenly sidled away from you, but to be honest life is full of paradoxes like this. I'm sure, this also has happened to you. You didn't heed it and when you moved round then, he didn´t stand behind your back. And I'm also sure, he came back- in "another form", another body, but he did!
Stranger need not to be someone unknown, person from abroad, it can be someone quite close till yesterday. It can be your good friend. Some situations change people into different one and then you can't recognize them although you want! Your best friend left you, not because he wanted, just because you two are not that couple of people who understand each other any more. You don't know everything about him and he doesn't know it about you. Things are changing and you two just don't want to be a part of others life, you cannot find any reasonable explanation for this situation. It sounds sad, it looks sad and… to be honest it is sad. Although we don't want it, we lose our home-folks but on the other hand new home-folks have been coming all time. At first they're strangers for us, after some time they can become our friends and more and more as well as less and less later. It's a constant circle of relationships in the world.
Friendship and relationships are things we have to revere. I thought that everything happening to me is a destiny, but now…I changed my mind. Sure, everything in the world has some purpose, some reason, there IS some destiny I think. But it's also true that everyone can choose if he wants to be happy or not. We have to be able to help ourselves, in a measure of course, for example to be able to find our own "saviour". Silly? Maybe. But it is definitely way how to be happy even we haven´t passed through the best times now.
So? Who are strangers???
 

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Komentáře

1 Zůza Zůza | 13. dubna 2007 v 21:17 | Reagovat

Si děláš srandu ne??????

2 Martii Martii | 14. dubna 2007 v 12:43 | Reagovat

zkoušelas to vůbec číst, nebo jsi to rovnou vzdala??? já jen, že se mi to docela líbí a chtěla bych slyšet nějakej názor

3 Zůza Zůza | 15. dubna 2007 v 16:01 | Reagovat

no jasny ze sem to necetla.... nejsem sebevrah!!!

4 verca verca | 22. dubna 2007 v 9:16 | Reagovat

jo tak me se to marto libi:) tyjo libi se mi jak to jako tak malebne zni:) to sem myslela tu ajinu ze mas hezka spojeni a co se tyce obsahu, tak myslim zes to vystihla;)

5 Martii Martii | 22. dubna 2007 v 10:43 | Reagovat

jejeee dik;) zkousela jsem to prelozit do cestiny, aby si to NEKDO mohl precist, ale bylo to fakt divny, neznelo to ale vuuubec malebne:)) skoda, ze uz me pak nic nenapadalo na to ticho...

6 Ada Ada | 26. dubna 2007 v 21:28 | Reagovat

Heej, to je doost dobrý. Fakt že jo. Myslim, že to vypadá jak z nějakej knížky- skoro bys to mohla sepsat a vydávat =o) Něco jako předmluva k nějakýmu příběhu...

7 Martii Martii | 27. dubna 2007 v 14:39 | Reagovat

ježiši to se fakt skvěle poslouchá:) teda čte... no hej už bych chtěla znát výsledky, jako jestli jsem byla hodně na konci nebo jak:)

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